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The Gifts of a Quarter Century

My husband gave me packs of Kleenex for our 25th wedding anniversary. While this may not seem like much for a silver anniversary, it speaks volumes of his kindness.

James noted that I asked for a tissue a few weeks ago when I was driving in his car. He went online, found Kleenex packs that had a cool design and ordered them in time for our special day. I couldn’t believe that he remembered this seemingly insignificant need but that’s just the kind of guy he is. That is just the kind of relationship that we’ve created over this past quarter century.

Accepting of the past. Rooted in the present. Hopeful for the future. 


These words are written on the back of my business card. These words are the basis for my marriage.

As I celebrated our anniversary this week, I felt a deep satisfaction in getting this far, surviving the ups and downs and navigating successes and failures. I know from past experience that marriage is not an easy path. I saw my mother marry and divorce four times and my father three. There are many ways to explore and experience the institution of marriage.

Our wedded bliss includes the raising of two healthy daughters, national and international moves and the start of a dozen companies. We celebrated first days of kindergarten, middle school, high school and college as well as graduations. We learned to ride horses as a family. We created a ranch with my father—“Grandad”—and learned to incorporate animals, weather and the outdoors. We have experienced hundreds of family dinners and family meetings. We have learned to appreciate and love each other, resulting in a high level of intimacy.

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An Overall Sense of Well-being

I am not alone.

This is the revelation I had this morning. Like the hot water bottle I sleep with on cold nights, I feel this reassurance radiating outwards, warming me with its simple truth.

What’s funny is that, I am right now actually alone, at least physically. My husband is on the East Coast for business as well as to visit our daughters, who work and go to college there. And my father, with whom we bought our ranch 13 years ago, is no longer with us in body though he is often in my heart.

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Considering Qualities for 2015

For 2015, I am choosing three new words: Responsibility, Acceptance, and Wonder. They spell RAW, so that is easy for me to remember. RAW RARA (my initials)!

I write each word/quality on a 3x5 card and keep it on my desk where I rotate through them, mixing them in with other vows I have taken and what I call “soul reminders.” I keep the words as a screensaver on my computer. I breathe them in as a way to fortify myself and weave in new qualities, as if I can insert them into my bones, the very marrow of my life and being. I still feel last year’s words: Balance. Spaciousness. Grace.
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I Will Shine A Light

Last night I got to play a very small role in a monumental event: Shine a Light. Invited to be a greeter by my friend and colleague, Mary Rogan, I stood in the darkness on the longest day of the year and opened the door for participants as they arrived to roll out their yoga mats and do 108 asanas to raise awareness about human trafficking. Shine a Light partners with organizations in Oregon and India to give refuge, rehabilitation, education and hope to individuals affected by or vulnerable to the commercial sex industry.

I asked Mary if she wanted me to say anything specific or shake people’s hands like I do when I am a greeter for my Rotary Club. “You can do whatever you want,” she said calmly. “Free form welcoming! I trust you.”
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Graduation Day and Hope

My 22-year-old daughter, Ella, recently got her first full-time job. Of course my husband and I, Proud Parents, are excited. When I posted the news on Facebook, it received almost 80 “likes” in a 24-hour period, the biggest response I’ve ever had on social media.

Youth and inspiration.  Hope and possibility.

Ella seemed perplexed at my delight and the tears in my eyes when I showed her the response. She hasn’t yet even finished the paperwork, not yet set foot in the office. I explained that my friends, most of whom are in their 40s, 50s and 60s, love to see and encourage youth. To see our children and their friends succeed, make good, pursue excellence, contribute to the world.

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